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In this episode, I have a really cool guest for you. Her name is Sherry Benson-Podolchuk. And today, we are going to talk about the disease to please. Here are some of the highlights:
- For women, it tends to be more difficult because we have this societal perception that women are always giving and nurturing and I think that the disease to please is something a lot of people have, and they don’t even know it.
- It’s curable
- People thought I just enjoyed always volunteering
- The people who respected boundaries understood completely. The people who did not respect boundaries called me selfish and inconsiderate and “Who do you think you are? And you always said yes before, why are you saying no now”
- It’s not an overnight thing, it took a long time for me to sort of find and figure out what works for me.
- When you are somebody who is an overgiver or somebody who’s constantly looking to please people, this is the disease to please people. It’s because your habits have allowed you to be this way. So your habit is yes. It’s just yes.
- A lot of women and overgivers tend to not be able to look in the mirror and say “I really like you”.
- There are really generous loving people who give, give, give and they have no idea what’s going on in their life. And maybe for some that is what they like to do. My concern is there’s a lot of people who are suffering from the overgiving and the disease to please and they really believe that they don’t have an option.
- Sherry’s self-care toolkit
Sherry is a retired officer with the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. She has written three books, “Lake Agassi Murders” a fiction novel, “Find your voice” and her first novel was “WOMEN NOT WANTED”, about her 20-year career and how she dealt with workplace conflict, bullying and sexual harassment. Since retiring she works as a professional speaker/educator/consultant focusing on workplace conflict and helping others find their ‘voice’. She is frequently called upon as a subject matter analyst by media and government organizations. She was part of two Federal government reports focusing on sexual harassment and bullying in the workplace, providing testimony and recommendations for changes in the RCMP. She graduated from the University of Winnipeg with a degree in Conflict Resolution Studies in 2012 and in 2015 Sherry presented at TEDx Winnipeg on ‘Tools to Survive Workplace Bullying’. Sherry has presented for Universities, SHEDay, RCMP Headquarters in Ottawa, Canadian Conference Board of Canada, women’s groups both local and international on the importance of speaking up about workplace conflict, sexual harassment, leadership and mental health. In November 2017, she received the Canada 150 Senate Medal from Senator Grant Mitchell, for her continued efforts at helping others speak up about harassment. She was part of ‘ASSHOLES: A Theory’ a Documentary by John Walker a Canadian and International Film director, that focuses on ‘bullying behaviours’, which premiered at the Toronto International Film Festival in May of 2019.
Her motto is ‘The power of your voice can create positive change. Everyone deserves to feel safe at home and in the workplace.’
This Episode has a lot of value and I hope you guys can get some inspiration on how to set up boundaries and take care of yourselves, your mental health and your well-being. We can’t take care of others without taking care of ourselves first.
Sherry Benson-Podolchuck
Website:
https://sherrybensonpodolchuk.com/
Facebook Page
https://www.facebook.com/sherry.bensonpodolchuk.1. https://www.facebook.com/womapodolchuk/
Twitter Profile
@womopodolchuk
How I survived workplace bullying | Sherry Benson-Podolchuk | TEDxWinnipeg
